Creepozoids (1987)

Director - David DeCoteau



Filmed with the panache of a Cinemax "late night movie" and the production budget to match, Creepozoids is the epitome of late 80's verging on the advancement of 90's movie making (lighting and costumes looked like a 90's soap opera basically) crappy movie. This was right around the time where the video market was getting flooded and VHS manufacturing companies like Lightning Video, and Paragon Video would actually start to finance film production. This isn't the case with Creepozoids, however this is just a reference point as to where this kind of stuff was coming from. Over saturation, quick to make, cheap to make, garbage...and it totally rules.


(Sweet foreign VHS box art and sleeve)

It's the future. World War III to be exact, and five army deserters have bailed on the big one to try and seek refuge in the wasteland that is the USA. Nuclear fallout has ravaged the landscape (er, what looks to be an underpass of a freeway, one of the few exterior shots in the whole flick) and acid rain comes pouring down at a seconds notice. The army dorks stumble upon a seemingly uninhabited warehouse where they decide to hold up for a while. Hey it has running water, hot showers (shower scene time), food, and supplies. Might as well stay for a while. Only the catch is prior to these brainiacs showing up some scientists were pressing random buttons and mixing different colored liquids and made a monster thing that lives in this place. Ruh roh.

Linnea Quigley (Trash in Return of the Living Dead 1985) does a shower scene or two and then the movie just turns into a third rate, ultra low budget Alien rip off. Pretty sweet deal. The laughable creature effects are part of this movie's charm, the thing smashes through the recruits one by one and sneaks around in the dark. The genius of the flick is that it was no doubt all filmed on a couple of sets, in probably just a few weekends, which provides for a stale yet claustrophobic setting (one of which I'm sure was intended but only half delivered since the movie is pretty bad). The humor is intentional? Who knows? The score is goofy. It also has a runtime of just about 70 minutes. The length of which I feel all movies should be.


(Boom. Shower scene.)

Things I've learned from Creepozoids? That Linnea Quigley was in a movie called Robot Ninja (1989) that I really, really, really want to see based on tittle alone. The director, David DeCoteau did in fact direct soft core early-90's porno for channel outlets like Showtime and Cinemax! It all comes full circle now!


(Giant rat...'cause...well why not?)

If you're a fan of the Italian's post nuke stuff, if you liked Alien and want to see what that movie could have been like had it been filmed in a warehouse with a bunch of community theater actors in it, then rent this. If you're a fan of movies like Hell Comes to Frogtown (1987) or Bruno Mattei's genius Rats: Night of Terror (1984) then rent this. I thought for sure my DVD copy was a bootleg, having bought it for way cheap at a recent horror convention, but after digging around I was wrong. It's just a terrible transfer with awful pixilated box art so beware if you are looking to buy it. Watch it with friends. Eat a pizza. Count how many times the alien/baby thing gets lost looking for the guy at the end...seriously it goes on forever. Building "tension" no doubt. Also one of my favorite movie posters, classic 80's cheese.

7/10